Blame the Dutch

And the Americans. It's really only in response to things that a couple of friends of mine* said about blogs never being worth reading that I thought I would start my own. Take that as you will.

Not sure who I expect to read it. Next to no one, presumably, given I've lived here for almost seven years and that any cultural references I make are likely to mean very little to anyone who is just planning to visit Estonia. And the readership who it might mean something to are probably the same people who'll hear me spouting off about such things anyway. Hmmm.

Bit of a potted history then: Australian, 29, lived in Estonia since 2000, having moved here with a teaching degree from Italy. Studied languages at university, with a triple major in Japanese, Latin and Italian, none of which have proven to be of any use to me other than in perhaps picking up languages generally more quickly. Spent roughly the first five years of my life here in Tallinn teaching English before making the switch to translating, having taught myself Estonian in the meantime. I've also authored and co-authored a couple of textbooks since I've been here, and worked as the Production Team Supervisor on the Eurovision Song Contest in 2002.

Most people ask me "why Estonia?" and my answer is always the same: vague. I don't really know. It was largely whim that brought me here in the first place, and I'm glad it did. Sometimes you just find yourself somewhere and think: this is right. I don't love my adopted country unreservedly; I'm too much of a realist, and too opinionated, and lucky to have been brought up in a country that never faced the struggles Estonia has.

I admire its pluck, but deplore its smugness. I love the fact that it is a quiet achiever, but hate it when that self-sufficiency is redressed, as nothing more than a means to an end, as vulnerability. I respect the people for their unwavering determination and unwillingness to submit to other people's values, but detest the hipocrisy and intolerance that this engenders.

Estonia is a complex place, ever-changing, and yet somehow always the same. And perhaps it's that very balance, odd though it may be, that I remain drawn to.

*you guessed it, one Dutch and the other American