Impotence, poverty, broken homes, brain death

Wielding the might of moral righteousness, three paper pushers from City Hall are championing sobriety in the capital with a plan to advertise against alcohol. The fact that they are from the Centre Party - which at the state level is out in the cold in opposition to the current coalition - and that their campaign takes a direct pop at the government's inaction regarding alcohol-related problems in the country is neither here nor there.

Under the plan, reported in today's Linnaleht, off-licences will be plastered with catchy slogans such as "Alcohol destroys your brain cells!", "Alcohol makes you impotent!", "Alcohol tears families apart!" and "Alcohol is a waste of your money!" in order to steer people away from the demon drink. And if the troika behind the campaign had their way, at least a few of the half a million kroons they intend to spend would see the slogans slapped on the bottles themselves, a la the warnings on cigarette packets.

And in fact I tend to agree with their views. I would back them all the way if I wasn't convinced they were just out for political gain rather than actually concerned about the health of the populace. Nevertheless, they have a point: the prime minister and his cohorts claim that putting the price of a bottle of beer up by about 50 cents is a giant step towards the eradication of the drink problem in the country, when it is clearly nothing of the sort, and seem not to be at all concerned that alcohol is responsible for many of the issues they tell us they are otherwise 'addressing'.

In that sense, City Hall's slogans are perfectly targeted, if they are designed to have a shot at the government. They constantly bang on about knowledge-based economies, upping the birth rate, keeping families together and making more money, and our triumvirate of public servants has pointed out - quite rightly, if not altogether comprehensively - that alcohol continues to play a part in scuppering all of them.